Where is home?

This evening I checked my mail (as usual) and lo and behold, I received an e-card from mum and dad... surprise, surprise! For no special occasion (at least not that I can remember) but just a sweet card just to cheer me up I guess... so sweet of them, I confess I felt a little choked up and slightly teary when I saw this card...



The card came with some background music... Fur Elise... a familiar tune as it was one of the songs I used to play on the piano when I was a girl. Sigh... seems like it was so long ago because many times I feel that I am so far off from the carefree little girl I once was.

I wonder why my parents sent me this card. Okay, the obvious thing to do would be to call them and ask them myself... but I'm feeling sort of reflective tonight so let me have a crack at it...

Sometimes I feel I've changed so much... I find it hard to remember who the real 'Serene' is. I feel like who I am now is someone that has been pieced together... a mozaic combo comprising of my career, my hobbies, my current activities, experiences, my role as a wife, ministry... aren't all these things what makes a person who he or she is? Yet the real heart of a person can get lost in the midst of all these 'things'.

At this very moment I hardly feel anything like that little 'angel'. But it's comforting to know that to the people closest to me, they still see through all the 'stuff' and know that I am still me.

Right now, I'm starting to feel a tingle of homesickness at the corner of my soul. I'm sure you all agree that home is basically where the heart is. But you know, I have pieces of my heart in different places... KK, Perth, Singapore, Sydney (and even to a small degree KL/Subang). And not to mention, I have left pieces of my heart with the different loved ones who are now all over the world... my husband (of course) my parents, my two brothers, my Rose girls, my Nottingham girls... and countless other friends I've made in every place I've called home.

KK will always be my ultimate home... because it's in my blood.

But as you can see, my heart is pretty scattered. So wherever I am and whoever I'm with, I realise that I will always have a little homesick corner somewhere inside me. Because at any one time, I will always be missing a certain place or a certain person.

Confused? It's okay, I confuse myself too sometimes.

Sigh.

Will I ever be whole?

Belaian Jiwa...

Last night after O2 we had supper at Evelyn's place (super nice apartment - the closest thing I've been to that I would liken to a penthouse!)

We had pulut hitam (one of my favouritest desserts!) shiok! Enjoying with music from Innuendo playing in the background... havent't heard those classic Malaysian R&B songs in a looong time... I'm sure many of can remember "Belaian Jiwa"

The song brought back memories of high school Talent Time and Bakat Interact performances... this was probably one of the most popular songs among those local Boy Band and Young Diva wannabes. I think at almost every single one of those concerts or performances, there would be someone belting out that familiar tune on stage.

It also brought me back to those times when me and my housemate Audz during our uni days would be just hanging out together, with her fooling around with her guitar... singing scraps of songs whenever the inspiration hits...

And I can still remember her randomly plucking the familiar strains of this song... and then sing... "Be......lai.......an..... Ji......wa......."

That was the only part of the song we ever sang... probably because neither of us could remember the lyrics of the rest of the song...

Amazing how one song can bring back so many memories...

Seindah
Tiada lagi kau ku ingatkan
Sayang kau hilang
Menanti
Biar sampai akhir hayat
Ku di dunia ini

Kau tahu betapa
Ku sayang padamu
Hanya bidadari sebagai ganti
Hanya takdir
Menentukan ia
Ohh belaian jiwa

Ohh angin
Sampaikan lagu ku padanya
Yang sedih pilu
Terimalah
Lagu ku jadi teman
Hidupmu untuk selamanya

Another challenge at work

I've been given the task to write a major report. It's quite a big report and a very daunting task indeed.

Sigh.

I meant to start on it right after lunch today... but as usual other things pop up... meetings, colleague ask for help, follow up on emails, look through some urgent documents...

So it was not until 4.00pm that I finally had a chance to start looking through all the various documents and stats to do my report. I really wanted to view this positively and take it as an exciting challenge.... but I got overwhelmed by the information overload... so sadly I didn't manage to achieve much by 5.30pm going home time.

Should I stay back and work on it some more?

I could... but my brain is starting to go into shut down mode. Plus I came into work earlier today for an early morning conference call to a client in Seattle.

Better go home.

So here I am now... trying not to worry about it. But at the back of my mind I see the report waiting for me when I go into work tomorrow. Maybe things will seem better in the morning when I feel fresher.

So good night for now.

Bonds of friendships

Recently, I have been part of a long email chain which was been going back and forth between my old gang from my church Youth group from KK...

It started with an announcement of the engagement of two dear brothers and invitation to attend their weddings this year.

Immediately the congratulatory emails started popping up from our various friends... which is indeed a very good thing to see. After all these years, the bonds of friendship still hold fast. This was something that began very simply years ago when all of us were still in our teens and in school. We attended Youth meetings every Saturday, did bible study together, served together in ministry, went for outings together to just have fun and do life together.

We've taken different paths of life since then... some paths have led us quite far away physically from each other... some paths have led us to do very different things from what we thought we would do when we were younger and dreaming of the future...

And here we all are... years later... working, studying, engaged, married (soon to be parents perhaps?) yet the bond remains. I can sense the bond because of the feeling of sincere rejoicing TOGETHER with each of these people as they go through these different milestones... and how good God has been in each of our lives.

Supa Golf

Public holiday today... Anzac Day!!! Our CG had an outing to Oasis Supa Golf in Swan Valley

(Note for my overseas readers: Supa Golf is an amateur golf course... an easier version of golf with oversized golf clubs, bigger golf balls so its harder to miss, hehehe, and bigger holes too... so anyone can play! When you come over to visit we can bring you there to play, ok?)

On the Supa Golf fairway - we opted to play the 9-hole game






Estee and Jack







Adding up the points... I did very well, hehehe... highest points mar!






The girls on our team







Group photo!!!


After that we headed to the Chocolate Factory for a late lunch...

(I actually have lots more photos, but I took mostly video shots - don't know how to extract still images from videos, need to wait for my Sayang to come back to help me with that)

It was quite fun actually... I was slowly improving bit by bit (thanks to some golfing tips from Tigress Woods - Kai Ting). Got technique how to lace your fingers when you hold the stick one you know! Toward the last couple of holes, I could feel the power as I swung the driver... unfortunately the power didn't transfer fully so the ball didn't go that far, but at least can feel it a bit lar... look forward to our next golfing session, man! *yeah*

A Noble Man

I have a confession to make. I have been quite a bad wife and recently did something not so right that hurt my hubby very much. I can't reveal the details because it is quite private. It's all over now, but I wanted to write about it just to impress this on my own heart... because I don't ever want it to happen again.

Part of why what I did was bad was because I refuse to see how wrong I was at first. My action was not a deliberate intention to hurt my hubby - but I think it's equally bad if not worse to hurt someone out of ignorance... i.e. I was not even thinking about it... that's bad because I'm not making a concious effort to check my actions to see how they might affect others. Thoughtless... very thoughtless. I think C.S. Lewis wrote something like that... that the "thoughtless kind of unkindness is the worst kind".

Okay, what was worse about the situation was that hubby was currently away on site during this whole episode. So we were communicating solely via mobile phone about this... which added to the difficulty.

I'm very bad with certain types of confrontation. So each time we tried to talk about this, I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to just say I'm sorry (but I did anyway) because just saying I'm sorry doesn't mean anything unless you do something about as well. But I didn't know what to do to make it up.

This went on for a few days. We avoided the subject and just kept our calls short and sharp to update each other on essential matters. It was very uncomfortable. I was behaving terribly by not doing my part. But I was just so frustrated that I didn't know what to do.

Finally, hubby did the most noble thing. He told me over the phone that he decided to close the matter, forget about it and put it behind us... and he doesn't expect anything of me, except that we move on.

The moment he told me that, something broke down inside me. What a horrible person I've been. How could I let things get this far.

The next day, I sat down and wrote a long email to hubby. It was the sort of email we haven't written to each other in a long time since our early courtship days. It wasn't exactly a love letter, but in the email I just put all my thoughts down into words. Not trying to justify or explain my actions. But I did say I was sorry.

I know this is getting mushy, but I just needed to share another thing that makes him so wonderful.

Postcard from the UK

Thanks Audz!

Things to do this week...

Numero Uno: Iron clothes!!!

Key to man's stomach, door to man's heart

My sayang (hubby) is home for the weekend - just a short break from his one month secondment at the client's site.

Soon after he arrived home he began clamouring for a real nice Chinese home-cooked meal.

Me being the darling little wife that I am, decided to make a good wholesome soup... soup is one of the most effective keys to a man's stomach which as we all know is the door to a man's heart.



Mmmmm... good soup - I cooked chicken soup with Chinese Wolfberries... really nice, I'm not just saying to praise myself - hubby can vouch for it! I enjoyed it too... my soul felt fully warmed up and comforted after slurping up the nice big bowl of sweet hot liquid goodness!

Soup is the key baby!

Jie Jie, what you doing?

I was at Diana's house on Sunday to borrow the use of her scanner. Little Christopher full if energy as usual was running round the house. He's getting more talkative, with his expanding vocabulary he's attempting to make intelligent conversation with guests.

Being the inquisitive fellow that he is, he dropped his toys and came into the study to investigate what I was doing. "Jie Jie, what you doing?" (Apparently a woman before she has kids is called Jie Jie all they way until she becomes a mum by when she is automatically promoted to the status of Aunty)

"Jie Jie, what you doing?!?!" in a more earnest tone. So I was obliged to give a minute by minute account of all my activities. "I'm turning on the computer, Christopher"... "Now I'm looking at my paper"... "I'm putting the paper in the scanner"... "I'm printing something"... "I'm typing out an email"... and after each account, Christopher will always answer in a highly intelligent and knowing tone, "Oooooohhhh!" as if he understood exactly what I said. Maybe he does, he's bright kid. So cute ya?

(Actually it's quite amazing to observe how fast kids grow not just physically but mentally as well... just 1-2 months ago, Christopher was in the "What's this" phase where he was always pointing at things and asking "What's this". Now he is obviously in the "What you doing" phase. I think it will not be long before he starts the "Why" stage - Diana and Ronald better brace themselves for that next phase!)

A sign of winter approaching

Today after I stepped out of the shower, I noticed that my mirror was getting fogged up. This would almost never happen in summer. Another sign of the approaching winter chill. Brrrrrr....

Ministry

Earlier just now I attended my first O2 Youth Meeting. FYI, Hubby and I have stepped up to help out in the Youth ministry in church. It was actually hubby's idea to start with. I personally thought I might be too old and wondered if I would be able to relate to these young people. But we talked about and hubby really had a heart for this, so we agreed that this would be something we would get into together - this would be the first time we would be serving in the same ministry together... so might be interesting to see how this develops.

Anyway at the Youth meeting, I was not sure what to expect... but I was really totally amazed - I am really humbled as I listened to the youths share and discuss during the bible study. They are all fantastic kids, full of laughter, joy and fun. Really brought me back to what seems like yesterday when I was in pre-teens class and Junior Youth. Those were amazing seasons in my life - values built and friendships formed for life.

I hope it will be the same for these kids in these humble beginnings to grow become leaders and people of influence.

Sad wife

I'm sooooo saaaaad....

Hubby is leaving tomorrow for one month!!!

Waaaaaahhhh *sniff*

I'm gonna miss him soooooooo much.

:(

Highlights from long Easter weekend

Swan Valley on Saturday afternoon... an indulgent afternoon of chocolate, cheese, wine, German beer, German sausages and pork shanks - the pork shanks were especially MASSIVE but super yummy! More photos here



Easter Sunday!!! Our church had an Easter carnival after service with food, face painting, mini-golf, sumo wrestling and lots more. Click here for more photos



After church service and the Carnival, we headed down to Mundaring to see the Mundaring Dam... very beautiful. Unfortunately there were no civil/structural engineers in our group, so can't comment on the structure or design of this dam. More photos here


And to enjoy a scrumptious pizza dinner at Little Caesars... we ordered six family sized pizzas and two dessert pizzas. Their pizzas are super unique, among them were Pisagnes (combination of lasagne and pizza) and Fettucine Pizza. For dessert we had this chocolate mud pizza and a cheesecake pizza. I was sooooo full after that, I think I ate about seven slices in total! Hubby ate close to ten. Click here for more photos

Crantini

A little cranberry juice and a dash of vodka...

Bahasa Sabah 101

Stumbled across this entry about the unique Sabahan "bah" (courtesy of blog.fawari.net) and found it soooo amusing - something to make sure I never forget my SaBAHan roots!

Apologies to those who can't read or understand Malay... won't attempt to translate it just now - sleepy bah... maybe next time, k?

PENGGUNAAN "BAH" DALAM LOGHAT SABAHAN

Saya salin dan tampal artikel ini daripada Friendster. Artikel ini menarik kerana saya kadang-kadang geram apabila berlakunya penyalahgunaan “bah” dihadapan saya. OK, biasanya dilakukan oleh mereka yang kononnya ingin “bermesra-mesra” dengan saya menggunakan loghat Sabah walaupun pada hakikatnya ia sama sekali tidak kena.

Salah satu penggunaan kata yang membezakan Bahasa Melayu Sabah dengan Bahasa Melayu piawai, ialah kata tambah “-bah” yang sering diguna dalam Percakapan. Kata tambah “-bah” mempunyai fungsi seperti berikut:

1) Kata penyudah untuk menguatkan ekspresi kata
Contoh ayat: Iya bah (Iyalah)

2) Kata tambah pemula untuk memulakan percakapan. Selalunya digunakan pada permulaan kata.
Contoh ayat: Bah, kamu pigi lah dulu(Kamu pergilah dulu)

3) Memberi maksud sudah, atau penghabis kata. Pengganti dalam bahasa Melayu ialah “Baiklah”, atau “Begitulah”.
Contoh ayat:
BM Sabah: “Boy, nanti ko pigi beli beras di kadai sana.”
Boy menjawab, “Bah.”
BM piawai: “Boy, nanti pergi beli beras di kedai.
Boy menjawab, “Baiklah.”

4) Untuk menegur atau menyapa orang. Lazimnya org sabah akan menyebut “Bah” bila berselisih dengan orang yang dikenali untuk tujuan menyapa orang tersebut.
Contoh-contoh ayat:
1.”Ko orang KL bah kan?”
2.”Sejuk bah ni air”
3.”Awal lagi bah ni”


PENYALAHGUNAAN “BAH”

Masyarakat sabah memang sinonim dgn perkataan “BAH” yang begitu unik. Tetapi perkataan “BAH” ini sering disalahertikan oleh masyarakat selain Sabah.

Mari kita menghayati dan renungi penyalahgunaan “BAH” dalam ayat-ayat ini:
1. “Apa kabar bah?” - Kononnya mau bertanyakan khabar (Ini salah)
2. “Suda makan ka bah?” (Aneh…)
3. “Bila balik bah?” (Tak betul juga)

Oleh itu marilah bersama-sama menggunakan bahasa sabah dengan betul, jangan Memalukan diri anda dengan kononnya menggunakan Bahasa Sabah tetapi Sebenarnya salah. Lagi… Bahasa Sabah and Bahasa Indon are 2 TOTALLY DIFFERENT THINGS...

Sekian, pelajaran untuk hari ini. Hehe.. lama tak update tiba-tiba keluar entri pasal “bah”.

Skipping with joy

Long weekend is finally here!!!! Yeaaah!!!! Can sleep in tomorrow!!!! Woohoo!!!!

And it's going to such a nice, exciting and fun weekend...

Jumaat
Going down to Riverview Church with the Youth to see their Easter play

Sabtu
Taking a nice leisurely drive down to Swan Valley with friends - hope to take lots of beautiful pics

Ahad
Easter Sunday! We're having an Easter Carnival after and I'll be helping to sell ice cream

Isnin
Just hubby-and-me time, last day before he leaves for his month-long trip to client's site *sniff*

To the drummers

New drummers are coming out in church... so exciting, and I'm happy because firstly it's a healthy sign of growth in church, and secondly because it will be such a relief on the current drummer who has almost been the ONLY drummer in church for a long time (incidently he is also a fellow Sabahan - majulah Sabah!)

I have a soft spot for drummers... firstly because one of my bros is a drummer (I have two favourite bros in the whole wide world!), and secondly because my adopted sis is a drummer also!

Earlier this evening, during the closing song at Leaders Meeting I was just reflecting about drummers (new drummer playing bah!) and I just suddenly felt how much I missed my bro and my adopted sis - Audzie.

Audzie was the utimate female-drummer icon... so banggah to have known and lived with such an icon (Audzie, I remember how you always looked soooooo coooool playing the drums down in front on Sundays!)

I hope one of my kids (no matter if boy or girl) grows up to be a drummer one day! hehehehe...

This is a pretty random post, eh?

Okie, off to bed I go... muaks!

Ordering food out of respect & courtesy

After dinner at home hubby and I headed out to Fast Eddy's for supper.

Actually, the truth is we had a special request to obtain the legendary Fast Eddy's menu. Hubby's business partners in Singapore wanted some inspiration and ideas for a new business venture. Fast Eddy's gives out free copies of its menu anyway, so this would not be a problem.

Question is, should we just grab the menus and go or be more civilised and at least order something to eat out of respect and courtesy? I was inclined to go for the former, but hubby said he will 'chia' me lar so no need to be so 'kiasu'

So I ordered a Vanilla Fudge Sundae (as usual, I forgot to take a pic BEFORE we attacked the sundae)


It was really quite sinful... but once in a while OK lar hor?


While we were there, I met an ex-Franciscan schoolmate from KK... it's really uncanny how people from your hometown pop up EVERYWHERE... for a big world, we are pretty well connected I think. We didn't chat long, but talking to someone from hometown always makes me feel like I'm back home in good ol' KK once again.

Anyway, we grabbed two menus after respectably paying $7.95 for the sundae. It better be worth it... hopefully these will help inspire creativity needed for this new business venture.

Canggih!

Came out from meeting, went back to me desk and looky what I found...


Office 2007.... at last!!! Woohoo!!!

Doing life together

On Sunday our cell group met up to kick off the newly restructured YA cells.

Main activity: Putting a jigsaw puzzle together (1C's jigsaw to be precise)


Topic of the afternoon: Roy's built-in wardrobe


So here we are doing life together... or should I say, doing 1C's and Roy's life?

Meet Lensy

Hubby has a new pet.

Folks, meet little Lensy.


Hubby saved it from a tragic death of being tossed into the bin. I was about to throw Lensy and his mate out after my 30 days of fun with them were up, when hubby bounded in and decided to adopt them.

Lensy's mate had an unfortunate accident being torn in two in one of hubby's experiments. But Lensy is doing quite well and is enjoying being submitted to dehydrating and rehydrating experiments and being pressed and prodded to test his texture and durability.

He lives in a drinking glass 'aquarium'.


And spends his time in between experiments sitting quietly at the bottom of his 'aquarium'.


(The truth is our optometrist suggested that hubby try out some contact lenses - he is still learning how to put his own ones on, but in the meantime he wanted to be able to study and conduct some experiments wit them because he found it so fascinating to see how they work - typical engineer?)